Finding Grace

Finding Grace

(Word from the Lord; He wants us to know how He is feeling for His people, even and especially those who have yet to know Him!)

As I lie on my bed, I begin to remember the feelings racking my brain and rolling around in my head.  I begin to ponder, as my brain goes off into some crazy wander. My heart is starting to feel much weight and emotion, what is stirring in my chest all this crazy commotion? Holy Spirit is it you who is reminding me, so that You can be the one to set me free? I'm beginning to remember the pain in my heart, the pain that I feel as its being torn apart. Torn apart from my love being taken advantage of, no way can that be a gift from above!  Is it really; is this how it’s supposed to be, sincerely? I'm asking You, because I do not know what the heck to do! How much more can I take this pain, why is this a part of the game? You say to forgive as long as I live, but where do I draw the line? Seventy times seven, is that how many times? "Forgive as I have forgiven you," You say. But on the narrow road of "Forgiveness" I seem to be falling astray. Is this what it means to be long suffering? Sometimes I just want to give up because my flesh feels like it’s for nothing! Your disciple said to "run the good race," but how much more can I really find Grace. Then all of a sudden I begin to weep, as I lie on my bed just wanting to get some sleep. In the middle of feeling this pain in my heart, tears well up in my eyes...this is where it starts!  My heart starts pounding like a beating drum. I begin to enter the throne room and remember the Son. I begin to realize the pain that I experience and remember is not my own, but the suffering and the heartache of the One sitting on the throne.  I remember I said I'd carry the cross, and that I'll bear the fruit of long suffering no matter the cost. "Oh my goodness what did I say?"  I remember again that my life is not my own, I gave it away. "Oh no, please give me peace I don't want to fall astray! My heart is now pounding in sync with Thee Father, I feel all in his heart that seems to be a bother. The anger, frustration, abuse, the pain! I'm being reminded Jesus felt all that shame. I feel the breaking of the Father's heart, and how he feels because sin tore us apart. And this is why He sent His Son, to redeem us to the Heart of the only True One. And even though He gave us this Love, what do we do but advantage of Above! Praise in His face only to take advantage of Grace! My God, My God how you are longing for your people.  Yet we are always trying to act like a building with a steeple. If we only take the time to dwell in your heart, we could rest in the rhythm of your breaking, because of what is keeping us apart.  Show me how to live and bear the fruit of long suffering, so I can get on my face and begin to know this walk isn’t for nothing. Do whatever you have to do to bring me to this place, even when I take advantage of your grace, whatever it means God just to see your face!  Tune the beating of my heart to the breaking of yours, so I can know the fruit of long suffering and the pain you’ve endured. Yes, remind me of the cross. Because I really need to be reminded, of the cost! To understand You’re Love, even at the price of Blood, this gift that you gave a sacrifice of your Son! Only to take advantage of grace and yet we still even get to praise in your face. The veil has been torn to know fellow ship with Thee One, even at the sacrifice of a son. I embrace the pain he endured for my sin, so my heart can be entwined with Him. Even if I take advantage of grace, do what you need so I can fall on my face, and embrace the fruit of long suffering, that I may know this walk isn’t for nothing. I am drinking the redemption cup of your blood, and eating your flesh so I can look like above. Burn off the dross with Consuming Fire and hide me away from the one who is a liar. I thank you my God for finding Grace; even so I can see your face. Seventy times seven, even more I’ll forgive, like You forgive me… so I can live!

Written by Jade N. Ciccone

on the 21^st day of November 2011.

Just venting...

Tired of walking into this place

open the door to see another face...of a liar?

Walking into a pit of fire.

Fighting these demons I face everyday,

while trying to keep myself from falling astray.

They ask for the truth and honest people.

But really, you're just another "X" on a steeple.

Walking in the darkness, they really don't want to hear.

What is righteous, they actually fear!

Placing trust in lies and the father of the liar.

Denying the Truth and not trusting what is Higher.

I'm becoming what is low... for better standard!

NO...not being status quo!

Running with the rest of the land?

I'm gonna fight these demons I face every day...

JUST TO TAKE A STAND!

Written by Jade N.Ciccone on the 25th day of March 2011

Born of the Spirit

Why does it always seem when something comes another goes?

And, where the wind blows nobody knows?

Is it going to the East or to the West, way up North or flying south?

Just like this breath of Life flowing out of my mouth.

This spirit flowing and flying around, me swaying and moving, yet sturdy like a tree.

My roots are strong and growing deeper.

In this Life, I'm still a keeper!

Selah

But why does it always seem when something comes another goes?

Where this wind is blowing nobody knows.

Not me or any sturdy rooted tree.

But we sway with the flow of this moving wind, even our roots entwined within.

Lean to the East and to the West, to the North and to the South, where ever it flows best.

Just take it day by day and go slow.

Selah

But when one thing comes and another goes, and where the wind blows nobody knows...

help me keep my roots growing strong so my bearings don't break,

and they keep growing long.

Prune me! Clean me! Let the dead branches fly...

off with the winds the ones that die!

I must keep my roots watered and nourished so I stay alive,

and not a tree that withers and dies.

Written by Jade N.Ciccone

February 2011

John 3:8 (Whole Chapter)
The wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou hearest the sound thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh, and whither it goeth: so is every one that is born of the Spirit

Matthew 21:19 (Whole Chapter)
And when he saw a fig tree in the way, he came to it, and found nothing thereon, but leaves only, and said unto it, Let no fruit grow on thee henceforward for ever. And presently the fig tree withered away.
Matthew 21:20 (Whole Chapter)
And when the disciples saw it, they marvelled, saying, How soon is the fig tree withered away!
Mark 11:21 (Whole Chapter)
And Peter calling to remembrance saith unto him, Master, behold, the fig tree which thou cursedst is withered away.

Eye of the Storm

"Eye of the Storm"

Painted by Jade N. Ciccone on the 27th day of October 2011

Eye of the Storm

Poem written on the 8th day of February 2011

(*This poem later became a written and recorded song on my up and coming CD, album release TBA!)

Clouds are forming in the sky, and storms are coming to wash what's dry.

Holy Spirit rain on me, wash me clean and set me free!

In the center of this storm right in the middle of the clouds that form.

He is holding me in the calm as I feel myself in His palm.

I feel the whirlwind spinning round.

Right in His heart is where I have found,

peace that surpasses all understanding

and joy that keeps me strong and landing

into His hands that are holding me.

In him I BELIEVE; He's set me FREE!

And even though the storm is strong, I'm rooted in him where I belong;

 planted like a tree at the rushing river side.

His blood He shed for me, that's why He died!

If I keep looking to Him in this storm

even WHEN these clouds WILL form...

He WILL KEEP ME in the calm, IN HIS HAND IN HIS PALM!

A whirlwind is defined in the dictionary as a small rotating windstorm of limited extent and a violent destructive force. Some scripture references of whirlwinds are in 2Kings 2:1, Hosea 8:7, Isaiah 25!  Elijah the prophet was taken up to heaven in a whirlwind or a windstorm.  I truely believe the Lord was showing us vividly that in the midst of our greatest and darkest trials we can still be right near God the Father in the Heavenly realms in his throne room close and dear to His heart.  Thank you to Him who sent a Blameless Lamb to become a sin offering for us; to tear down the veil that separated us from access to the throne room.  Thank you Jesus for laying down your life that I could become a daughter of THEE Father in heaven!  If not for Him I would not have the peace and joy that I have which gives me the strength to live and "keep on truckin" every day of my life. And funny enough, its always in my darkest moments I feel closest to The Lord of Hosts  who is always protecting me. I have begun to appreciate the darkness for had I not known darkness how would I know Light! And when the Light shines on my darkness, the darkness decreases and doesn't seem so great but a perfect mistake where God works ALL THINGS together for our good! I begin to LIVE the TRUTH of THE WORD OF GOD and I understand!

Psalm 107:29 He calms the storm so that its waves are still

Job 26:12 He stirs up the sea with His power, And by His understanding he breaks up the storm